Tortoise, Deer and Pork Rinds…What do they have in common?

Fjord Tortoise

I’ve experienced two unusual traffic situations two days in a row. Yesterday it was a Ford and today is was a Jeep.

To your left is the culprit in yesterday’s massive traffic jam in Dale, Texas. He/she is considered a fugitive and is thought to be armed (or is it legged?) and dangerously green. Also, deceivingly slow and about the size of a large turkey platter. Significant markings include pond scum in the shape of the Ralph Lauren Polo Pony on rear quarters and a tongue stud. A reward is being offered for any information leading to its ultimate live capture and/or creative use of its remains in a bisque.

The other traffic incident occurred today near Driftwood, TX. Home of “Salt Lick” BBQ!

Danger, road ahead!

I had just passed the restaurant and was seriously wishing I had followed my instincts and grabbed some take-out ribs. They would have been perfect to gnaw on while I waited 25 minutes for the police to clear the accident. You would think someone would have been injured but their was no ambulance and I was second on the scene.  I think the driver is the guy in the freshly pressed white T-shirt and Luv’s Truck Stop cap. Hands on hips as if saying,

“Swear ta God, that river weren’t there a minute ago.”

My advice is try waiting to chug your lite beer until AFTER you cleared the curve next time! And honestly, I don’t know how he survived…maybe the bag of pork rinds in his lap softened the impact.

My first eight-point!

Looking forward to what tomorrow brings. Maybe I’ll get lucky and bag a nice buck, legally, out-of-season!

ghfool

About ghfool

My life ambition is to be a bird

Posted on April 11, 2012, in Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Bad pick up doesn’t work that way.

  2. H Jay Rockaway

    Did you drive home with that buck in your truck and let it die in the garage? That seems to be going around.

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