FIFTY SHADES of GREY: Or, I don’t think I was supposed to read this book

So a friend of mine loaned me this book called “Fifty Shades of Grey” a few months ago. She had also given me a book about raising boys and some spiritual stuff and so I said thanks and put it in my pile. I love to read and always have at least three books going at the same time. I would get to it eventually.

So today is my 50th birthday, and as if it were a sign from God, there it was…the book…staring at me from atop the pile. A fire was blazing in the fireplace and I didn’t feel like doing much…so I snapped up the book and got comfortable on the couch.

I don’t read book jackets or reviews and I definitely don’t read the last page first. I like to be lured into the subject matter of my reading, whether it is fiction, non-fiction, historical or self-help. The cover was dark and classy and it stated that it was a “#1 New York Times Bestseller” so I knew I was in for a treat. But I did ponder how a book about the history of the Crayon could be so popular.

Oh, well…I cracked the cover and attacked the first page with unbridled vigor…

OMG!…WTF?…Hmmmm!

To be continued…

ghfool

Adopt an Animal! This week featuring: THE GREAT WHITE SHARK

I have to say that I have never been more excited in my life about anything!!!  It was recently bought to my attention that I can adopt a wild animal…wait for it…for only $25.00. It sounded too good to be true. So I had my research staff (me) look into it while I took a long deserved nap after a morning six-pack of Shiner beer. Then I reluctantly awoke and found the following article on  my pillow.

Ya know how there is this whole thing about kids wanting a pony for Christmas, or a bunny for Easter, or maybe some strange looking tall dude in a weird hat and beard for Presidents day? Well, those boring days are over! According to my information you can adopt, among other things…a Great White Shark on a Walmart budget!

I hesitated for moment when my research staff informed me of this, but then after a several Saki bombs they convinced me that Great White Sharks are incredibly great companions.

Why, you ask? Well check this out.

Why wouldn’t you want to adopt one of these wonderful creatures?

NEXT WEEK: Honey Badgers

ghfool